Saturday, 14 March 2015

The Wall 2, EP7 and Spandex 2



If you hadn’t noticed (Our Mrs well noticed) we spent most of Feb building a mega structure in the Red Laser Disco club venue. At the conception Me, Sonofapizzaman and Randal Marsh realised immediately this would be the hardest thing we would ever do regarding a club event and proceeded in the determination we were actually doing something different. Not to book a massive DJ name to get bums on seats. Actually create to attract. We agreed no matter the effort and cost, if it was dead we’d be content in the fact that we gave it our all. 

The wall on the night. Visual heaven


Well it wasn’t fukin busy and we lost loads of doe “aaaarrrgghhh” but the 120 people that were there, every single one of them, had their head blown off. We stood in front of the wall, soaking up the mega structure and tranced out at the immense visual deluge knowing we had lost doe laughing out loud shouting repeatedly “Look at that wall gee!” and “Best 400 quid I ever spent!”. The following day a little worse for wear, we went back in the venue to dismantle the bastard. Crane, the venue owner, was less arsed than we were about the numbers. He was still buzzin about the visuials! “I believe in anyone who puts that much effort and passion into what they do”. That statement from him made the decision easy. WE DOIN IT ALL AGAIN (Idiots)!!!  So on Good Friday April 3rd the wall is being rebuilt and we goin in hard with Ruf Dug, Kid Machine LIVE, Dave Owen, me (Il Bosco), Randal Marsh and Sonofapizzman.
Please support your local gees. We on the recoup init. Red Laser Corp shares need a boost
Tickets here. "CLICK HERE"

Artwork for Red Laser EP7

In true Red Laser style it takes us a while to get the machine oiled and fired up after the Christmas burnout and finally after a 4 month gappage we have the first release of 15. EP7 has been in the pipeline for a while with all 3 tracks doin the rounds on soundcloud and via test pressings given to a lucky few so we have had the pleasure of hearing them destroy some of Manchesters finest club nights. It’s a full on Manchester affair of youth versus early middle age.


In the red corner Metrodome - Mondo



The executive teen from the ghettos of the M15 has the refined taste of a music sage beyond his years. His EP7 jam is fukin mint. Recently I get a lot of emails from labels selling there artists and tracks. To be honest it grates on me like the hard sell in any situation so im gonna go easy with the imagery drenched diatribe. Whatever I write about it, the acid test is when you bowl up to a DJ an ask “What the fuck is this?” I they reply “Mondo”.


The slightly older Kid Machine – Wheels of Fury



Habitant of Manchester’s largest estate Wythenshawe, has given the label my favourite track from any of his productions to date. Me and Red Laser resident DJ Sonofapizzman have been smashing this one to death and dancing like mongs.


Si-Fi systems The youthful Dan Wainright and the considerably older Chris Massey – Explore Your Mind



Young and ‘not so old’ create a slick analogue chugger with fizzy acid qualities. Chris Massey is no stranger to Red Laser releasing the belting The Trunk with Italian producer DJ Rocca on EP5. This collab with Dan sees that same distinctive chug and production value as before.

Due to a recent job change and doin mi exams I missed promoting the EP7 special riso print artwork version when the pre orders went up. Finally I get round to it and they have nearly all gone already!! 250 Red Laser house bag sleeve versions will be available very soon in many of the usual independent shops.



Also on the Horizon Ste Spandex’s EP2 finally gets released. Watch out for it in all the shops that usually stock Red Laser. Feels great to listen to Ste’s completely unique style on wax again. I aint hard sellin this. I don’t need to. It’s the breath of fresh air I needed right now.  Spandex’s music is perfect for deep thinkers so if you don’t think very much about anything other than the shit that’s spoonfed to you by popular radio don’t bother. Gotta say Ste cracked me up the other week when I saw the artwork for the first time . “The paper I got the prints on is mint” “Rip proof gee.” “Check this” and ripped the corner off the fucker ha ha mint. Spandex Poweeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr… By the way Ste did you know Spandex is an anagram of expands?

Bosco and Spandex around Red Laser Records birth 2012



Below is a picture of Spandex’s recent project. Two 90 minute tapes announcing a “No Vinyl Mixtape” had me buzzin and thinkin “Wish I’d a thought of that” So im currently making a no music mixtape and hoping to release it on Cerberus Industries. Will send soon Ste. All tracks on this mixtapes are Ste’s creations. Listening from start to finish will take you on an inspiring journey with moments of darkness, un-ease, industry, documentary, techno and outright euro laser disco. Pick em up here quick ""CLICK HERE"

See you in front of the wall


Il Bosco

Thursday, 22 January 2015

First Red Laser Disco of 2015 and Wines 3




Well it’s been too long since I last wrote anything other than the Red Laser pledge to the shareholders (As seen on the back of Feb 6th event flyer below). In fact the last blog post was wrote on 16th September!! In Septembers post I had promised a selection of blog posts and completed zero. 


Matt Ward you were In your right to call me a ‘Fukin fraud’ for not delivering (as promised) the xmas booze review special so I’m doing it in today’s post to comfort all those who were relying on me for clear choices when deciding on their festive grog selection.  Readdressing your retox with alcoholic harmony is only a paragraph away winos so read the fuck on.


 First of all let’s talk about the real reason for the inspiration to write again. Me and label partner Matt Triggs decided we should really ramp up the quality and amount of releases in 2015 and we set about getting the ball rollin. LP 2 is in production and Ste Spandex EP2 and EP7 ready to release. There are a few more artists twelves and EP’s to follow those so it made sense that we needed up get the Red Laser Disco party upgraded so to provide a stage for the roster in Manchester. As part of this upgrade we added to the team fellow bulb whisperers Randall Marsh and Sonofapizzaman and I formally congratulate them with their successful applications. 


The first Red Laser Disco meeting with the new team went well. It started with some cautious brainstorming, we then got excited about some solid ideas, got slightly scared about the effort and cost and finally settled on something stressfully back breaking, divorce inducing and financially impossible. I’ll be lucky to still have a bird at the end of this one. Why? Because in a short space of time we are building a club inside a club. Yeah check that shit. To make this happen we have been working through a list of jobs bigger than Harold Shipmans death list so expect professional execution (No pun intended), slick production and attention to detail followed by wreckless intoxication (Except Marsh who’s up the next day on club clearing duty).


 So what is going on inside our club inside a club. STARION FUKIN LIVE thats what!! Starion the italo electro boogie jam meister finally lays down a live show on home turf. After getting some live debut practice at the Magic Waves winter festival in Berlin he is ready to obliterate Bangkok (Bar) in Manchester. All his Red Laser material will be going down freestyle gees. Also; ‘Come witness a galactic cat scrap’ as the social services boogie queen Ladybeige takes on a couple o the Disco Mums in a cosmic slam down. If you’re lucky they’ll all be ‘on’ at the same time just to ramp up the scrapage factor and if were really lucky it will be a full moon too!! Heat like this is sure to rip the fabric of space and time so pack your reverse thrusters for a quick getaway if you find yourself the target of an underserved face melting rant.



Who else is melting faces on the night? – Il Bosco (Yeah that’s me), Randall Marsh and Sonofapizzman.  CLICK HERE for our own event tickets (buy local) or HERE for the Skiddle version. Tickets are also available in physical form from Piccadilly Records Manchester.

Before I start the wines selection I must say theres been a wealth of great imagery, seen throughout this blog post, on Red Laser Disco facebook page throughout 2014  (CLICK HERE TO VIEW) and a special shout out goes out to Aaron Fitzgerald who I now officially crown ‘Red Laser Disco Image Digger Of 2014’. Congratulations dude..



 Right so here’s what I been drinkin

Cal Pla – Priorat – Spain  2012


 Straight in with a fukin belter this was a Christmas prezzy from mi Mam. Salford has come a long way over the years. Mum lives round the corner from the notorious Langworthy Road a once post-apocalyptic playground for violent crowheads and street rats. However It now bustles with restaurants and wine shops in the shadow of Media City, a 500 million pound play centre for television lovies and bum chums who have positively created the demand for posh supermarkets and local deli's in the area to quench their lifestyle upgrades. Mum always made the best of her brazen social skills and so it wouldn’t surprise me if she had a good inside hook up at the local Booths cos this wine was showbiz class. A lovely Spanish Red from the Catalan region of Priorat the area known for its enriched mountain soils and relentless sunshine. These 10 year Garnacha and Carnena vines combine to create a mystically deep almost black cherry red that caramalises at the edges. On the palate the deep colour is confirmed as you can predict via rich jammy red fruits, ripe and sweet with a slight metallic twist of ox blood. No sharpness on the tongue ramp this gem up the quaff-o-meter toward the ‘piss the bed zone’ Verdict - El Toro personified


Meinklang - Burgenland - Switzerland



Switzer-fukin-land!!! Wine!! Well yeah makes sense really. They got the money, they got the altitude, they got the soil, they may even have the sunshine thru the summer and, lets be honest, they aint got anythin better to do than hide criminals decimals and fix clocks. The swiss winemakers must be yodelling all the way to the bank with this 10 outa 10 cracker gee. Visually it looked clear and bright in the glass. The same colour you get with synthetic fruit drinks in corrugated clear plastic cartons. After a good ogle of its form I emptied my lungs, plunged my conk in the glass and took a deep breath. My nose filled morning dew, dainty mountain flowers and freshly washed lederhosen. I immediately slurped the grog around my mouth and it wrapped my taste buds in strawberries and cream. This got better with every glass so big thanks to Sam at 8th Day in Manchester for bringing this to the party. This went really well with cold turkey and stuffing butty’s Verdict – A Sublime Alpine Wine


Marques De Valido Rioja Reserve


OLA!!! We’re back in Spain!!  Spain is everything you want in a country (except for its passion for a recession) and without a doubt Spain is one of my favourite places to visit out of anywhere in Europe due to its great English pubs, English Breakfasts, English speaking locals complete with regional eccents and a visit to one of the seven wonders of the modern world, the 24 hour Only Fools And Horses Restaurant situated in the Costa Del Sol, serving roast dinners round the clock while showing OF&H on huge screens constantly. But this wine is from a different part of Spain, fake Spain to exact right in the north in the Rioja Alavesa Region. Although the world reknown Rioja region is drenched in the pride of its admirable winemaking history it is full of actual Spanish people (Weird!!)... Despite Spains ressesion adiction wine production remains a strong export and not surprising due to examples like this being widely available at great prices on supermarket shelves in the UK. The Tempranillo grapes in this nectar create aromas of sweet berries simmering in vanilla. It rains cherries and liquorice on the palate and has an earthy old oak decay in the outro. Goes really well with a small salad presented on a minced beef patty separated by a cheese slice between a bready bun from a gaff called maccy’s.


Casale Di Valle Chianti – Chianti –  Italy






Italy – I’m home. You cant beat Italy for wine, music and paradoxical evil in the name of Christianity. Lets forget about the last bit and hone in on how good the wine is. When you get a good Chianti you cant get a better wine anywhere. They just encapsulate all that’s great about Italy. Sexy, dark, flowing, luscious, leggy, brazen, cocky and homoerotic all in a bottle. Just how I like my men. Only jokin. I’ve actually tried to fancy men but figured out quickly I’m definitely straight after once looking at a guy and thinking “Hes a good looking guy”  and then trying to imagine sucking his dick and puking in my own mouth. Just born that way I suppose!! Any back to this wine. Visually and on the nose nose its blingin the Ruby jewels with a big berry perfume. On the palate the fuker splashes rasberries and pepper across the tongue with a long finish and great legs that work the glass like a catwalk model. This is a fukin feisty mare so buy double cos your defo want more when its gone

Maynard’s 30 year aged Tawney Port



 So this aint exactly  wine but it is a fortified wine so that counts and means I can talk about it. Last year was the first time I got into Porto. This year I went back to Aldi to purchase this absolute belting ruin. I could easily end up living on a park bench if I could get my hands in this every day of the week. Fuck me it was like collecting everything good about Christmas and distilling it into liquid gold. I pretty much did half the bottle to myself and have had to hold back from going back in to purchase another bottle. Port is so much more complex than wine. The Nose was a so deep it turned my brain into pudding. On the palate it was thick and creamy with so many notes bouncing around like an orchestral masterpiece. Notes of oak, leather, currents, sour cherries, dates, orange peel, lemon, leather, tobacco, liquorice caramel, and on and on. My mouth is watering on to my laptop as I type. Christmas could not come sooner so I have an excuse to spend another 50 quid on a bottle of pure happiness. Also came presented in this amazing ‘ships decanter’ as informed at dinner by Captain Mike. Respect to our sailors for solvin that one. “Fuck the iceburg what about this constant booze spillage problem” – So good it’s now a yearly tradition (plans are afoot to make it quarterly) in the Bosco Bodega.



Hope that filled a gap left before crimbo. Don’t forget to purchase yo tickets for Red Laser Disco on Feb 6th here as they always sell fast and £8 now is better than £10 on the door (For you. That’s actually better for us) (CLICK HERE) for the tickets and info

Laters


Il Bosco

Tuesday, 16 September 2014

Silverclub



Theres been another big gap since the last blog post. Not because of writers block or owt like that. Just been mad busy which I suppose is one of them ‘good problems’ to av. A phrase often uttered by turds. Busy with what? Well theres at least 6 releases about to drop all in the next few months including

Red Laser Disco – Hits From The Manctalo Discotheque (double vinyl compilation album of rare and classic italo records) Blaine (My man on the artwork) - Only one L in ILL Bosco Gee 



Red Laser EP6 (Out just now) (Nick Smith, LeonxLeon, Hot Sporran and Starion)




Red Laser EP7 (Metrodome, Kid Machine and Si Fi Systems)




Kid Machine – Red Planet EP (Deep dark space tackle)




Ste Spandex EP2 (taxed this image Gee. Get on wi ya artwork init)



And this absolute fukin monster of a twelve

Silverclub – Back to The Start EP


Up till now Red Laser has only released the work of lone producers dotted around Europe. The first year was great. I realised we were doing something that was different and relevant. The parties we did got busier. The demos flowed in from all over the world from people we never met. And I started to see an old face around the scene. Duncan Jones has always been a part of Manchester’s underground music as a musician and producer. Amongst many other releases over the years he had released an album with Silverclub a few years earlier and following that LP there was a change within the bands line-up and direction. When he sent me the new music I was immediately gobsmacked. A real band making discoid acid synth jizz!!! And they in my city!!! WHAT THE FEEERRRRRK!! All the things I love about alternative music are in these tracks. Thick analogue percussive vibrancy has a scrap with a sophisticated discoid lyricism resulting in shaky legs, adrenaline overdosed heightened senses and a fuck yeah fist in the air for every track on this ep. Red Laser had to put this out. We had to rep this band. Im just glad they came to us first. The EP is a masterpiece and seeing them do it live is un-believable. You can catch them playing at the EP launch Party at the Deaf Institute Manchester on 24th September CLICK HERE for the event.. Theres another band supporting and Me and Peter Mangalore DJin. 



Regarding the Vinyl release you can pre order here (CLICK HERE) direct and listen to the tracks and read my track descriptions. OR you wait till it hits all the usual underground record shops around the UK and Europe  but better for me if you order here as the more we sell direct from our site the better chance we can break even or even make some money to keep this shit alive!  yah meeen?




Other shit that happened was the Bank holiday weekend. Went up to Hebden Bridge for a night out and stayed in one o those air B&B’s in the hills with the Mrs and friends Emma and Steve. Felt like the owner must have been homeless for the night as the gaff was, well, her fukin house!!!; with everything still in it including pictures of her son Cosmo! I know he’s called Cosmo because I read his homework! You gotta hand it to those Hebden Cats in the liberal stakes. They make Choltonites look like National Front. Anyway the gaff was a proper old-school cottage which was mint and props for having a vinyl collection and record deck too (Nowt worth robbin though). Anyways that night I was guest DJ at established thills rave InkFolk. What a top gaff and great people. Chris and Charlotte the promoters looked after us really well even though they had been up for 2 days solid partying. Got back in bed at 7am, ad a vally and slept till 11. Bacon butty and over to set up the Wet Laser BBQ.


Wet Laser BBQ Gets Goin




What a venue (Pic robbed off Daren Woods Facebook)




Inside the Brewery's Arches


That was off the fukin chart! A piss up in a brewery in Salford with an amazing soundsytem outside under even more amazing railway arches, with no bouncers fukin with peoples vibe (That was left to me and Marsh) and loads of homeless minesweeping beers while everybody got busy avin a mega time.  Then it moved into the brewery where we had another party and then when that finished we fucked off down the Roadhouse where we had another party (Big breath aaaaaghhhhhh). Big up to Kwasi for bobbin in on his way home from Blackpool and gettin on the mic.and also to LeonxLeon who danced from 1pm to 8am solid with only a break to DJ 

Actual photo from the Roadhouse



The worst bit of the whole 13 hours  was having to dispose of the human turd at the entrance to the BBQ. When asked “How do you know its human?” I simply pointed at the skid stained tissue next to it and said “That’s some dog that can wipe its own arse". Big props to the Wet Play crew for goin twos up with the promotion and special thanks to Randall Marsh for sharing all the dirty jobs like the a fore mentioned turd removal. 


Currently working on Wine reviews 3 for all yall who gittin cold turkey, Whiskey reviews, 80’s New Romantic bible records (You wanna see the stash of this shit I found in Macduff recently) and Il Bosco’s Christmas gift ideas (Meant to do this is June but got side tracked)

Il Bosco

Tuesday, 22 July 2014

THE HISTORY OF THE BBQ


Back in somewhere in the early noughties, while doing the Friends & Family parties, I had fucked up light bulb moment! I decided I would do an outdoor version of the party. That idea may not sound ground breaking to most people, but to attempt an outdoor club night in the wettest city of the wettest country in Europe was pretty fukin radical Gee! 



Times were grim and we hadn’t had a summer for 4 years for fucks sake! I found a nice outdoor space at the back of a bar called Kro and booked a bunch of local vinyl collectors and record shop workers to DJ. As the day of the event got nearer it rained every day until the night before, then, miraculously, it was dry and warm for the party and then the following day it pissed it down. I had been blessed. (The Gods love a trier eh!) 


Over the next ten years I would do umpteen more BBQ parties eventually morphing it into the Red Laser BBQ as the record label started and to reflect my changing musical tastes. The change obviously wasn’t for some old schoolers who had indulged in Funk, Jazz and Hip Hop in its Friends and Family form but for others the exciting sounds of Italo, Boogie and generally good types of house music made the event fresh and new.


Then, early this year, I tried to book my usual Kro Bar and got the knock back from the venue. WHAAATTT!!!! The venue owners blamed it on problems with noise complaints from the Church next door (We always had to turn the music down for Sunday mass from 5pm – 6pm and pay the Vicar in liquor the piss head) and the crowd not drinking enough booze from the bar so the venue could make up their promo costs. The venue’s promo costs you say??!! Yes a venue that paid a promoter to put the event on not the other way round. Could you believe my luck?. I had been on a top screw for 8 years as the venue paid for the sound and the promotion to the tune of a grand. When finally another set of promoters asked to do a BBQ (Taxin my fukin idea AND venue) my financial screw became untangled as the new crew let the cat outa the bag the turds! You can imagine them askin the owner how much did HE want for the hire of the venue and then the owner scratchin his head like “What? You pay me? But I’ve been payin Woody for 8 fukin years!!” 


But everything happens for a reason eh!! Just as I was deciding to knock it on the head I was chattin to Randy Marsh of Wet Play and he had an idea for something similar with local boogie crew and music lovers The Social Service. The Social crew had been the offered an amazing new venue in a brewery on the outskirts of Manchester city centre in Salford (Even better it’s in the land of my birth) called The First Chop Brewing Arm. Not only that I knew the owner Rick as a Fat City Records regular from back in the day and he’s a fukin dude. Because it was Rick I knew this gaff was gonna be dope without even lookin but when I finally did see it I couldn’t believe how amazing it was.  After some toing and froing and much love from all three parties the Wet Laser BBQ is born. 



So now all that’s left is to give you the run-down of amazing selectors booked for the event and keep our fingers crossed for the weather.



James Holroyd (Back To Basics / Begin)

Jim or Boggy as he is known to friends is somewhat of a legend and inspiration to many DJ and producer worth his/her salt in Manchester and mucho further afield. Not only is he a great DJ (Defo one of Manchester’s finest), he has impeccable taste in music. The best club journeys are created when selector knowledge and DJ skills collide and Jim has an abundance of both. He has been producing music for years and his latest Begin project has created a string of instant Balearic classic records. Check em out here (Click)

Mikey Donn (Band On The Wall / Krispy)

Again another legend. Mikey is more well known as one third of UK Hip Hop pioneers the Krispy 3 and as a regular spinner on the Reggae and Bashment circuit but not many people realise how good Mikey is spinning Boogie, Disco, Acid House and everything in-between. Anybody who attended the Red Laser BBQ a few years back will remember how he obliterated the gaff!!! This guy is a sick DJ. Check him out here (CLICK)

Randy Marsh (Full Beam / Wet Play)

Full Beam and Wet Play man Marsh jams the boogie like it was his last day on earth. When he aint working on bonkers creations (Red Laser Desk brighteners, Marital Aids, Il Bosco Kemp Folds etc) he’s spinnin boogie down the gravy pit and various underground nights around Manchester. All you style biters bring your note pads and pens as you are sure to hear a whole heap of jams you can rob and claim as your own (Turds). Check his mixes here (CLICK)

DJ sonofapizzaman (Full Beam)

He’s Randy’s DJ partner at Full Beam and an avid collector of boogie and Italo vinyl’s that you aint heard before. Don’t ask him where he got his DJ name from. The clue is in the title you muppet. Top head. Top spinner. Check his mixes here (CLICK)

The Disco Mums (Red Laser)

The toppest bunch of DJ girls in the UK and residents of Red Laser Disco. I aint heard any girl DJ’s that play better choons than these and all vinyl too. Just avoid em when its rag week. They been DJin  together solid for 3 years now so they all come on at the same time. FIYAH!!! Check their mixtapes here (CLICK)

Il Bosco (Red Laser Records / Fat City)

That’s me!
Check me out init – (CLICK)

Metrodome (Red Laser Records / Wet Play)

This cat has so much showbiz talent he shits sequins. Nobody gets lost in the enjoyment of Djin more than Metrodome. Not only that his fukin selections are the bomb. Its always a real treat watchin this guy do his thang. I cant decide if he’s better at DJin or producing. Get the idea here how good this guy is here (CLICK)

Kickin’ Pigeon (Wet Play)

Pidge brings deep house and quality techno knowledge as his specialities but don’t pigeon hole this G. As one of the Wet Play crew he brings amazing eclecticism and is knowledgeable in all genres. As you guessed he’s a brillo DJ (As if we gonna put on anyone shite!!!) and always brings class and surprises to his DJ sets - (CLICK)

The Social Service

The crew that bring Manchester one of the best underground nights in years. They don’t even need to do their thing in the city centre. In fact it’s that good they don’t even do it in a trendy suburb!!! The Social Service jam their shit in Stretford. These guys have a combined record collection of super gems. They DJ with passion and skill and never fail to rock the fukin joint. Check there vibe here (CLICK)



At the time of writing there may be a couple of super special guests in the pipeline. We just finalizing the late night after party sitch so watch the event page for any updates (Event page click here)

Traditionally the BBQ sells out. Admittedly the tickets usually sell out a few days before so no rush (Just don’t forget)

Tickets available here from skiddle (CLICK TO BUY TICKETS)

And from Piccadilly records in Manchester - (CLICK)


So here we have the all new improved BBQ the Wet Laser BBQ happnin in a venue that will blow peoples melons apart. We don’t get paid to do it here! All the love is pumped into makin this an experience for all that attend. And as for Kro Bar, so what I lost my cash cow. Those times were mutually beneficial and really should be the blueprint for all promoters as it’s always less risk for a venue. The BBQ’s at Kro helped me raise the money to start Red Laser Records and paid for a load of expensive B0 posters too. Anyone want any let me know got 10 from each event takin up space in mi garage send a message to redlaserrecords@gmail.com


I got no beef with Kro and the owner Mark I gotta heap of respect for as a straight talkin entrepreneur with his feet on the ground. Anyway for those who missed out on last month’s free promoters spread sheet giveaway click here to download and spread the link to friends who may need assistance in managing their costs (CLICK)


Il Bosco

Thursday, 3 July 2014

BBQ, New Releases, Spread Sheet & Gibberish




Il Bosco has been a busy man over the last 6 months and thinkin bout where to even start with this blog post is difficult. Where does one begin!!!  Well im gonna slip into pro mode style and break out the logic thinkin.



Blog Agenda
  1. Red Laser Releases
  2. Incoming events and DJ gigs
  3. Mancunian Jibberish
  4. Free Download  of all singing all dancing Excel spread sheet for useless promoters
  5. Summary



Section 1 – Red Laser releases

Yeah we been quiet for a while. 6 months from the last release is a bit too long but now the clip is full and we ready to shoot G’s. All releases available here just keep a look out for updates - CLICK HERE TO BUY

First up - Starions – Mindbender EP.

Check this shit. Crystal clear cyber italo and italo boogie jams. This cats like ahead of his time. Your useless mates who are into Lana Del Ray and shop in Urban Outfitters will be bangin on about this shit in 20 years the turds. By that time we gonna be on crazy shit like Autotune Hardcore or summat.  We did 50 only artwork sleeves for this release. We posted on Facebook with the link to buy. Within 3 hours all 50 were gone. SOLD OUT!!!!  The proper release comes out soon in the newly designed Red Laser house jackets. If you want a Starion release and get a beady eye on Discogs and snap before the mega price tags start poppin. But just in case you didn’t know there are 3 uber ultra spezialize test press EP’s with super rare extra goodies available here ONLY – The Pyramid Suite (CLICK HERE)
Next up - Red Laser Records EP 6

4 more tracks curated to express just what goes down in Manchester and gives the true taste of Red Laser. Manchester is a city of music lovers. We don’t give a fuck what anyone else thinks. This is our sound. Starion brings the Italo, Nick Smith brings the Warehouse, LeonxLeon brings the DISCO and Hot Sporran brings the darkness. More details to follow but eben off the test pressings the gang have been dropping the tracks. LeonxLeons track has obliterated a few dancefloors already after DJ Emerald of the Disco Mums taxed it from Red Laser HQ. Again there are 4 uber ultra spezialize test press EP’s with super rare extra goodies available here ONLY – The Pyramid Suite – Click Here MORE DETAILS TO FOLLOW (I just cutted and pasted that line from above. Being lazy. Ope it don’t show)




 More you say - Ste Spandex EP 2

The unmistakable, uncompromising sound of Ste Spandex is back on this 4 track 12” featuring Red Laser regular Sarah Bates. The boogie ethos features heavy on this EP. The test pressings came back the other week but we cut an old version and it had to be redone. New tests back soon but that means theres 4 EP’s with a track that should never have gone on them. I got one. Ste got the rest. RARE SHIT!!! Hunt that fuker down!! Proper release imminent. More info to follow in the coming weeks



EVEN MORE!!!!!!! Fuck yeah!! - Kid Machine – Red Planet EP 

I aint even gonna go on about how good this shit is. All im sayin is – ON CONSTANT REPEAT IN BOSCO’S GAFF – CONSTANT G. This is a fukin heavy heavy heavy heavy heavy EP. More details soon

Surely there can’t be more? Fuck yes, and don’t call me Shirley!

RED LASER DISCO DOUBLE COMPILATION LP – RARE AS ROCKING HORSE SHIT ITALO BANGERS. 

After being dogged with recording and mastering issues we have nearly finished a project that has been 2 years in the making. MORE INFO SOON
Ok that’s the release stuff nailed.


Section 2 – Incoming events. Plenty appnin to us over the next few months but eres the pick

Wet Laser BBQ – Sunday August 24th – First Chop Brewery

After loads of mithering from everyone that went to the Red Laser BBQ’s we goin in for the mega session. Red Laser and good mates Wet Play are doing a joint affair. Just like when all the Power Rangers merge into a massive kick ass G Red Laser and Wet Play will become one huge Mechadisco to slay all discos with weapons of mass vinyl gems complete with Jamaican BBQ scrannage bombs (Jek Chicken and Goat and Akees n stuff). Not even that Mothra could defeat us sonically. Anyway what was fuck was that moth about? If Godzilla had any brains he’d of just rolled up a massive sheet of paper and swotted the cunt. Er,, im digressing. Full line up to be revealed as some of our favourite DJ’s have agreed to play. Things kick off at 3pm outdoors. If the weathers bad it don’t matter. We got a big grotty archway to do our thing under. If its sunny we just step outa the shadow of the arch. Simple!!! Later the event moves into the indoor club space till late. It’s a fantactic place with a fantastic soundsystem so get yer cheap tickets asap. £7 nicker for the first 50 sold then we goin £8 quids. The BBQ’s always sell out. Just sayin!! - GET UR TICKETS HERE



Electric Elephant

If yer out in Croatia come check us. I’m playin with Groove Armarda and the Una Bombers in Barberellas nightclub from 12 – 2 on the Saturday night. If your too mangled to make that then catch me on the main stage on the Sunday from 9pm till 11pm with Darren Green and Ashley Beadle. CLICK HERE FOR DETAILS




Section 3 – Mancunian Jibberish

Shut yuh grid
Do one yuh Bulb
Sort yuh napper out
Fukin leg it
Go fag it
Buzzin tackle
Top jib
Nice one ar kid
Giv a shit
Nar mate
Ava day off
U got the cleanest arse in Manchester. All yuh shit comes outa yuh mouth
Lick u out
Suck ya bulb
Laters



Section 4 – Free Un-download of promoter spread sheet - Stop Press!!! I gotta download link - http://we.tl/68DUw522Fp

Here I made this just for all you promoters that are shit with money. Now you can manage your costs and make informed predictions when promoting your next party with the all singin all dancing multi coloured promoter spread sheet. Input  numbers and costs in the boxes lined red. This will update the final totals boxes for you to breakdown yo shit financially. As the p[rofit rises the profit box changes colour from in the Red to in the Green. Use the fucker wisely and you may even make some doe on your next event!!
If you want the spread sheet after the link has run out leave your email address as a comment and i will send it over. Happy forecasting yo



Section 5 – Summary

So now your up to date with all that’s happnin in my world right now. You got the release schedule, you got the event dates, you rockin some faux Manc Jargon and you makin doe with your spread sheet. Look out for Wine reviews “THE SUMMER SPECIAL” comin soon. Stay safe heads


Il Bosco